Last 3 letters of the spring

I am over you

Or, am I tripping?

I am over you

Or is the time just poorer?

I am over you

Or am I being ruthless?

Have I cried all the tears at yoga? Do I have something left for the sidewalk?

I am over you

Or, am I just keeping it cool during the week? Weekends are for eating pizza, rewatching Twin Peaks, and touching the bliss

I am over you

Or have I buried it 6 feet deeper?

Have I ever been honest?

Unlikely — a crybaby with sharper cheekbones

I am over you

early in the morning, when the sun rises

I see rainbows in your hair

Your motionless body is peacefully sleeping 

You wake up first, eating your protein bar in the kitchen

I hear the door

you slammed before leaving when rushing to work — I haven’t left that bed yet

maybe tomorrow, or the day after that

compulsively drinking magnesium, iron, and more

Will I ever awaken?

I am over you

Or have I forgotten to look for the only living boy in this city?

Some days are harder than others

Most of them are just days I keep eating my food in my kitchen, in slow motion, looking over my shoulder

Nobody’s coming, I just look over 

lovingly 

I am over you

Or am I just hiding inside the apartment where all my stuff is? I don’t even think I miss you

It’s just, you haven’t even seen my new place

funny tho, you seem to be everywhere

And I wouldn’t want anyone in my house

except your motionless body sleeping peacefully in my bed

eating protein bars in my kitchen

Taking showers — too long

making my puzzle, completing the circle of desperate lovers

kissing 

a crybaby with sharper cheekbones

 Am I over you, or simply pretending it’s over? 

I keep forgetting leftovers I promised I’d eat

stored deep in your fridge

I am over you

Or has my hair grown longer? How much length does it take to forget 

the last three letters of spring? 

And what do you say when it’s over anyway? And what do you say when it’s not?

I am over you 

It’s too late

I am torn

draining shit

Do you still want it? Let’s fix this — how? idk

It doesn’t move on

It simply is

early in the morning when the sun rises

And your side, still empty, of the bed you never slept in, ‘cause everything’s haunted 

I live in my head with the ghosts unwanted 

impolite company taking way too much space