The last 3 letters of the spring

Tell me something
a story about a little girl with hazel eyes running
in circles waiting for a life worth living
wearing a dark green hoodie 
still remembering the humming of 4 Sons
forthcoming, the voices hazy

Tell me something light, like the dust on old books or the first day of winter 
when it smells like cold, velvet scarves, wrinkles 
around your mouth 

Cover your body with a shirt 
navy color I see
When I catch your eye, I take my clothes off 
I want to make you beg for me
Nostalgic depression—in the elevator, 4th floor
doors closed, moving swiftly
I want to make you beg for more
watching the back of my head in the mirror

Come closer - I am done crying, stay in my life as much as you like
Here, drink some water, my darling
I want you to sleep in my bed, build a fortress of pillows, wake up early, and dance when you eat
tell me nothing about love—I want to make you beg for me

Tell me something about darkness
It must have hurt when your grandpa died
Tell me how your heart gets smaller every time you can’t remember 
where you’ve placed your keys
That one time in remission, he knew your name for a minute
You look like your brother, he said
and never called to mind again

Tell me something about losing control—the leader of all the holy angels
I want you always, I want you sleeping safe, bare in my bed 
Tell me something about forever
It must have hurt when you got that gotta talk message
She didn’t say goodbye
She said nothing
I thought you were going to leave me
just like
When my grandpa died
I still see him conducting orchestras
Each musician only hears the one leading, but never the others—they drive in the dark

Tell me something about the time you felt like running
because you look like your brother, he said
and never called you by your name again
It’s maj btw.

Tell me something about forgetting
I am happy, I promise
Tell me a story about that warm, bright morning, and her first words were:
I am still alive, not a serial killer, that’s nice
reaching for your arm
the lips
only just meeting the shape of his head
forthcoming, the voices hazy
hazel eyes unflinching 
I want you to beg for more
Give me the light at the end of the tunnel
If there is something at the end of this maze—I want you always, sleeping safe in my arms

Tell me again about the time you felt like choking
at the look of the wounded creaking soul
I remember the day 
She didn’t kiss me goodbye
She took her book when she left
She hasn't stopped crying since then
...
so I heard